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NUFC News From April 3rd 2005


Newcastle United Are A Disgrace To Their Fans!


It pains me to say this but it's nigh time this was said - the club we follow unconditionally is a damn disgrace to us all. That's right, an absolute disgrace. Bow your collective heads in shame and apologize for this traumatic and down right disgraceful season you have forced us to endure. Apologise to those of us that have put you in your positions of power, that have built St. James' Park our magnificent home that the class of 2005 aren't fit enough to grace, who have bought your luxurious homes, expensive cars, flash tom and showered adulation on your sorry arses without fail.

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When The Chips Are Down... Sell Them A Dream!


Chairman Freddy Shepherd, speaking to Sky Sports News has admitted he would like to bring England and Real Madrid striker Michael Owen to the club.

Shepherd said:

"It would be a nice thing to happen to get Michael here.

"But we can't talk about players who are at other clubs, we don't do that here, we play by the rules.

"In today's prices we've saved ourselves more than £25 million by persuading Alan to stay on.

"If we hadn't we'd have had to go out and replace him.

"We'll be bringing in a striker in the summer but now we need to look at one rather than two. It's a fact that he needs to be a top striker."


Is Michael Owen the new Patrick Kluivert? Same old NUFC, trying to placate supporters with hot air. Expect the Owen rumour to churn out whenever we hit a bad patch.
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Gruesome Twosome Say Sorry


Disgraced Toon duo Lee Bowyer and Kieron Dyer were ordered by manager Graeme Souness to appear before live TV cameras to apologise to the club, their family and to supporters... yet there was no apology to one another.

Bowyer speaking first, said:

"I would just like to apologise to the fans, the chairman, the managing staff, all the players and everybody that is connected to Newcastle, my family and everybody that witnessed what happened on the football pitch. I am sincerely sorry."

Dyer said:

"I will touch on the same as well. I would like to apologise to my team-mates, the manager, the chairman and the fans and everyone connected with the club as well.

"We are team-mates and we have disagreements, but we should not be fighting in front of 50,000 people. I am deeply sorry for it, especially because it is a crucial stage of the season."


Meanwhile Souness insists the pair have a future on Tyneside but holds no blame towards Dyer, claiming he did nothing as he saw it and describing Bowyer as "indefensible".

Souness said:

"I have been assured by Kieron Dyer that he did not throw any punches today and was on the receiving end, so that is the road we will be going down.

"I think Lee Bowyer is indefensible, the pictures show him throwing more than one punch and he has to accept what punishment comes his way.

"But we feel Kieron has an argument here. I have seen the incident once on television and have been assured by Kieron that he did not throw any punches and that is the route we will be taking.

"I can envisage both of them playing for Newcastle again. Players like them do not come along every day and they are class players.

"I will have to speak to the chairman but that is my view. I hope he feels that if it ever happened again it would be the end for them.

"Hopefully the chairman and the board see it that way.

"It is fine, there is not a problem between them or between any of them.

"That was something new for me at Newcastle, I have never seen that at training."
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